remembering birth dates!

i went to my darling's office just now to hv lunch together. among other topics that we talked about, i mentioned that today is my ex boyfriend's birthday. he then asked, why is it that u still remember his birthdate?. i simply answered, once before, that date was the important date that i had to remember. so now the date kinda stuck in my head although i tried hard to not remember it. then i asked, don't u still remember ur ex girlfriend's birthdate? he said, i don't anymore.

maybe he is in denial, or maybe he really has forgotten that date. i don't know.but why is it that i still remember it?

anxiety attack?

Symptoms of an anxiety attack include:

Surge of overwhelming panic Feeling of losing control or going crazy Heart palpitations or chest pain Feeling like you’re going to pass out Trouble breathing or choking sensation

Hyperventilation Hot flashes or chills Trembling or shaking Nausea or stomach cramps Feeling detached or unreal

I need to calm down. Fish makes me calm. I'll watch they swim. :-)

tolak kerja.

this PHENOMENON is everywhere.
recently it happened to me and the worse thing about it is: i am the one who tolak kerja to another person.

there was this meeting that i have to attend short noticed. i came to have knowledge about it at 7.30am and it was scheduled to be at 2.30pm. Since it was an order from boss, so i decided to start the day by:
1. finishing yesterday's work, then
2. meet boss for approval of yesterday's work, then
3. start to prepare for that meeting (read through the file etc.).

task 1 and 2 completed by 9am.

so i started to do task 3. but seriously i was not feeling very well from last night but i came to office anyway just so dat i can complete task 1 and 2. when i met boss that morning, i planned to ask him to let me go for half day since i was not well. but before i could say that he started to shower me with "do this, say that and don't mention this or that in meeting petang ni yer" so i have no choice.

ku gagahkan jua diri ini utk membaca fail tebal ni. walaubagaimanapun, at 9.20am i failed. i felt so weak..all my bones were shaking and my joints aching. i was so dizzy and my temperature was rising. so i said to my colleague that i am bringing this file home to read it then i'll go straight to putrajaya (for that meeting, it was in putrajaya).

so i arrived home. but what i did was only lying helplessly in my bed and cover myself up with thick blanket.at the same time, i tried to read the file anyway.
at 11am. i gave up. i called my colleague, i asked her if she could find me somebody to take over this file, i really can't take it.

there was nadiah. she was my saviour. she said yes.alhamdulillah. but i felt so stupid for bringing home the file..now i have to send it back to office..alahai..

no choice!..so i drove back to office.send the file to nadiah. then i said to her, thanks very much..plis give me some of your files, i'll do it for u..she said, it's oke.

n today, when i received two of her files, my conscience is clear n i am relieved. i'll do that for you nadiah because i owe u that much.
(conscience's clear but i'm sure that in the mind of my boss, mazuin tolak kerja!)

i've been to sabah.

i only have three words to say.. sabah is beautiful.

i'm going to sabah!

i'm going to sabah tomorrow, with my darling, kanorr sama dee..!! yeyeyeyeyyyy!!

can't wait to see abby..THE BRIDE!! and lovely ck..(i think i miss her already just bcos i know that she's not in kl anymore)

feminist mode switched on

Kalo ada pegawai perempuan yang tak berani pegi court, dat doesn’t mean that other pegawai perempuan pun takot nk pegi court! Itu masing-masing la. She has her fear, I have mine too.

Jgn la sbb fear dia, sume org di assume to have the same fear. (NO OFFENCE to any pegawai perempuan in the office, seriously, I didn’t mean to offend u in any way)

Oleh sbb dia lelaki, pegawai perempuan ditolak ke tepi?? What kind of thinking is that? I normally am not a feminist, but in this sense, I AM!!! Damn u!!

Las month, same thing happen, just because i'm a lady, i'm asked to do the work..!
What’s wrong with the world??????? diskriminasi..bengong!!

(although i don't wish to go to court, but this issue is bugging me!)

budak baik dan sampah

hari ahad lepas, seperti biasa kami mahu keluar dating. wan da sampai, dia baru je keluar dari kete dia n menuju ke gate rumah aku sementara aku tgh start enjin kete nk reverse keluar rumah. Ayah masa tu tgh angkat dua plastik hitam yg berisi sampah diletakkan atas skuter yamaha ego dia. Ayah nak gi buang sampah la tu (Ayah selalu pegi buang sampah yg besa2 ke tong sampah besa kat tepi flat pkns jln kuching tu, aku kalo disuruh ikut, naek la moto ngan ayah smbil pegang smpah tu smpai la ke tong sampah besa tu).
Ceritanya bermula bila wan terus menuju ke arah ayah untuk salam ngan ayah la. Ayah nye soalan pertama kepada wan hari tu "nk tolong buang sampah ke?" then wan dgn pantasnye menjawab "bley, bley" pastu mereka terdiam, wan pandang ayah, ayah pandang wan.
lepas tu, wan offer ketenya digunakan utk mengangkut smpah2 tersebut. tapi ayah hanya tersenyum dan terus jalan ngan motonye meninggalkan wan terpinga-pinga. Masa wan terpinga-pinga tu, kete aku da keluar dari garaj dah pun dan aku tgh nk tutup gate. then wan pun masuk dalam kete and masih terpinga-pinga (comel).
so aku tanya la apa jadi tadi, maka wan pun cite la sume. then wan confuse, nape ayah senyum n terus jln. aku assume, ayah expect wan trus naek moto ngan dia utk gi buang sampah (spt apa yg slalu jadi antara aku ngan ayah) tp wan tak naek2 pun time ayah tunggu wan naek, so ayah mungkin tersenyum sebab ayah tau, wan mghadapi detik kepelikan yang teramat sgt (super awkward). wan maseh tak puas hati dgn assumption aku ni. tp topik tu berlalu begitu shj.

Smpai la mlm td (isnin mlm) aku borak2 dgn mak. Aku cite la fasal kejadian tersebut kpd mak, then mak pulak tiba2 gtau yg ayah ada mention fasal tu kt mak smlm. Mak kate ayah kate, bila dia ajak wan tolong pegi buang smpah, dia terkejut yg wan akan respon "bley, bley" dgn pantas. Ayah ckp wan budak baik sbb dia nmpak wan ikhlas nk tolong. then mak sambung, dia kan anak lelaki sulung, slalu tolong mak dia. then ayah ckp "oh patutlah..budak lelaki laen takkan la nk tolong sbb yg saya nk buang tu sampah. sampah busuk.tp saya terkejut dia cpt2 jawab boleh"
aku yg tgh dengar mak bercerita ni, terus tersenyum. panas je muka ni,..blushing kot? hihi..senang hati bile ayah dah terima wan. trus la aku kol wan lepas tu, cerita kt dia. aku yakin sgt skrg hati dia berbunga2.